Blowing My Top

I honestly have NO clue why my Mother insists my fans be turned off in the middle of the day.  They help circulate the air in my room which would otherwise be a sweat box due to the desert heat and disgustingly small A/C vent in the room.  But no... she has to turn them off because she doesn't like the running all day.  WHY!?   Is there some catastrophic epidemic of fans suddenly ejecting their blades and decapitating people!?

I FINALLY got her to stop rearranging my desk.   Set one boundary... she breaks another...

Puzzling

I'm beginning to regret getting this damn puzzle in the first place. I bought a 2000-piece puzzle that was a picture of an Italian village on a cliffside... with great colors and nice blue water cove. Well it took us (my Dad, Mom, and I) under a month to assemble but then the trouble began. We bought puzzle glue to seal it together, but my Dad's eyesight is terrible and he couldn't tell where he already glued it. So the puzzle wasn't properly sealed. We flipped it and I did the reverse (cause I could see it) for extra rigidity. Then decided I should redo the front just to be sure. So we did that. Then we mounted it on a piece of foam board so that it would stay together better. So far so good. But to make sure it stuck to the foam board, Dad decided to weigh it down with a ton of books on top of it... right on the puzzle! The top coat of glue wasn't dry yet and my Dad decided not to put any protective cover on it... so the puzzle STUCK to the books and pulled away some of the design when he removed them. So now there are torn white spots on the front of it.... nice job, Dad.

Finally we started on the mounting string and that is ripping right off the back of it so I said I'd come up with something and leaned it against the wall. And now my Mom won't leave it alone. I've told her like 4 times that I'll take care of it after I figure out a way to mount it. But she keeps bugging me about it. I told her again this morning to not worry about it and she said "I'm not worried about it" and I said "Well you keep pestering me about it!" And then she huffed out and slammed my door. UGH!!

You can't set boundaries with that woman. She just stomps all over them anyways!

Never Free

I'm coming to the realization that I'll never be free of my parents influence... and therefore I'll never be able to live my life the way I want.

As I posted here long ago, my parents are very religious... and coming out to them just isn't an option. It would destroy them and with so few years left, I've always been of the opinion to let them spend their declining years in happiness and not upset them. I know that sounds pretty morbid actually... because in effect I'm waiting for them to pass away so I can live my life the way I want. But last night, someone in my online game said something to me that totally tossed that right out the window.

Being a religious family, one of their core beliefs is there is a Heaven where we go when we die... and that God has prepared a place for us there. I hold this particular belief to be true as well. While I don't perscribe to all their religious views, this one makes since to me. That said, for some reason I never thought about them leaving this world and being in Heaven... yet still being able to look down upon me and my life. So when this guy said "Don't you think it would be better for you to tell them the truth, rather than have them find out after they're in Heaven looking down on you?"... it totally knocked me down.

I went to bed crying last night... because my life seems over now. I can't live my life the way I want now... and I won't be able to in the future either. They'll always be with me... watching me... and that is totally scaring me now. What if I slip up or do something they wouldn't approve of? What happens if I fall in love with someone and I can't do anything about it because they're a guy? I'll never be able to date who I want, fall in love, or experience true happiness.

I've never wanted to hurt my parents. It's why I've concealed this for so long. But now it seems I'm destined to hurt them no matter what I do... and I'm not sure I can live with that.

Happy Father's Day...

...to all the Dad's out there. I'm heading down now to meet up with the family for Dad's Day. We're just going out to dinner and then I'll be heading back home. I'm sure the conversation will inevitably turn to why I don't have a girlfriend...

I just love family gatherings.... :S

It's over now... the Music of the Night!

Wow! Just wow! We're just getting back up to our room after seeing the 'Phantom'. And the critics are right... there's really no need to see the show ANYWHERE else! The Venetian built a custom-designed theater for $40-million to house the production, and you can see why. The amazing integration with the story is truly incredible to see. The new chandelier sequences are stunning, and will astound even those who have already see the production multiple times either on Tours or on Broadway.

When I first found out that they had cut the production down to just 95 minutes, from the nearly 3 hours of the broadway version, I was nervous. I was afraid the hatchet job they would do to the pivotal songs and scenes within the play would destroy the feel of the play. But I was wrong. The cuts are noticible if you're a PHanatic like me, but they do nothing to the underlying feeling that this is definately the Phantom... and is definately one of the best productions you will ever see.

After the show, we were suppose to go out on the strip to see the Fountains of Bellagio and the Sirens of TI, but once again the winds were not working with up. Sirens most definately wasn't going to be running but I still wanted to try for Bellagio (my favorite free attraction on the Strip). But the parents were both against it, since it was so windy. We just wound up coming back to our hotel and grabbing the tail end of the dinner buffet before coming up to the room.

I guess this town just isn't for them. They like to gamble but the nightlife isn't something they go for. Mom is too much of a morning person and is usually the first one up. So since they're not too keen on seeing anything else, we're leaving a day early... tomorrow morning at 6am. (Yeah, 6am... thanks, Mom).

So I'll probably plan a mini-trip for myself some weekend... when I can afford to come back up. Cause I definately want to see the Phantom again... maybe with someone I can share it with who won't be exhausted right after the performance. :(

Parents Arrive Today

My parents should be showing up in about another hour. They're driving up so we can all take a vacation to Vegas for a few days. We've got a lot planned including some college baseball... (mmm college bois)... and a trip to see 'Phantom: The Las Vegas Spectacular' at the Venetian. I'm getting excited to go, but it's gonna be hard to oogle the eye-candy with my parents (who I'm not out to) standing right next to me. :(